BY SKYLER, DEB & TIM SMITH
RESET ~ I left you last week with Dr. Gluckman at the Mendon Village Animal Hospital with two bold promises. #1 ~ to tell you the story of the Gluckmans’ romance, and #2 ~ to share Dr. Gluckman’s story about the smartest cat in the history of Mendon. This week I’m here to deliver.
ROMANCE ~ Speaking of Mrs. Gluckman, who we coincidentally happened to run into during my interview at Pizza D’s, the doctor had what he called a Hallmark story to tell. They actually met at the first place he worked, but they only worked together for one month before he moved to Mendon. So he knew her, but not very well.
They parted ways and after separate marriages, they had a chance meeting 29 years later at the Pittsford Federal Credit Union in Mendon. For any of my readers who may have dismissed the PFCU as a hot pickup spot, you may want to reconsider. Not that he has ever treated an animal of this species, but since meeting Mrs. Gluckman, Dr. Gluckman has been happy as a clam.
SMARTEST CAT IN TOWN ~ Dr. Gluckman’s funniest story was about the smartest cat in the history of Mendon. It’s a tale of pride and passion, of greed and gluttony. It’s a story of a felonious feline who created a false identity and used it to live life high on the hog. But as we all know there is no “purr-fect” crime and Dr. Gluckman told us the story of how this double-dipping cat was ultimately discovered and exposed.
EVERYONE NEEDS A PLAN ~ Let’s start our story with a cagey cat named Blacky. On the surface Blacky appears to be pretty much your typical outdoor pet cat. He often disappears for hours at a time but dutifully reports back home for his three square meals a day. Displaying his obvious ingenuity, Blacky crunches some numbers and lands on the premise that if three squares a day is good wouldn’t six be even better?
“But how do I accomplish this double dining desire?” ponders Blacky. Then we see a light bulb go off over the cat’s head. He realizes that if he can somehow endear himself to a second owner the buffet line could be never ending. So Blacky moseys on down the block a piece, charismatically channeling all the cuteness he can muster and looks for his mark.
Then he spots her . . . an animal loving woman with two cuddly kids who “ooh and ah” every time Blacky rubs up against their legs. After rubbing the kids and nestling the mom, Blacky knows he’s made the breakthrough. His second family bestows the name of Midnight upon the black cat. Obviously this cat is not sporting a collar or tags, a key component of the master plan, so as long as he can make the adjustment to respond to the call of Midnight at this house, Blacky/Midnight has just doubled his meal plan. I told you we were looking at the smartest cat in town.
NEXT WEEK’S TEASER ~ Look forward to my conclusion of this tale about the smartest cat in the history of Mendon. Unleashing my barrage of animal clichés, come back next week and be prepared to watch me like a hawk and make sure that I don’t try to weasel out of something, become pig headed and lead you on a wild goose chase. I promise I’ll be like a bull in a china shop and not let sleeping dogs lie.
Suffice it to say that the feline star of my story, Blacky/Midnight, is now living high on the hog. But as was the case with Chicken Little, the sky would soon be falling. Hold your horses, the lion’s share of the 800-pound gorilla in the room is about to really get my goat, and the cat’s meow is about to go to the dogs. The cat’s about ready to be let out of the bag and Blacky/Midnight’s ride on the gravy train is about to end cold turkey leaving him mad as a hornet.
